Back at it

I am now entering week 3 of "back in the workforce" and it is a mixed pleasure. I know normally people would say a mixed blessing, but that didn't fit and I am trying to not go back and edit the way i think/write as much. So a mixed pleasure it is.
There is something to be said for adult conversation about the trivial fun stuff, about office politics and gossip and about work itself. I have been, admittedly, taking my time to get back in the swing of things here. I haven't been putting too much on my plate as i take a good long look and figure out who I am when I am here, meaning what my role will be: what projects and areas I will focus on and how to build strategies for that.
I am missing the children - but not as much as i feel other people think i should. How terrible that sounds. I am thrilled to come home after work each day. I get big smiles from both the kids and i want to hug and kiss them for hours, but while at work I find I am involved enough in actual work that I just don't miss them. Although, at the end of the day I do find myself wondering what i might be missing. I am eager to hear about their day and like the stories Olivia tells me. So, I'll feel a little guilty for a little while longer that i simply do not want to be a stay at home mom.
We sorted out our daycare woes - no spots available for Olivia full-time and no spots for Dan anywhere near our home or work routes. We found this great young woman who is coming to our house to watch the kids until September when she heads back to University and Oliv and Dan go to a daycare centre. I have spots reserved for them (I think, I hope - they are rather vague), but due to aforementioned vagueness, I am going to search for some back ups!
I cannot believe Olivia is going to go to school in September! How did that happen. She's still such a little girl - was I that young? She is starting to be very grown up in some ways and really wants to make all decisions for herself. When I came home from work last Friday, she asked if she could go next door to play with the young girl who lives there. I said sure and walked her over. "Hi Meghan," I said to our 8-year-old neighbour. "Here's Olivia come to play!" Blank stare. "Did you invite Olivia over?" (crap, sinking feeling...) "No....but she can come over if she wants..." (crap - note to self - tech Olivia about inviting...) "Great!... umm I'll call over when she should come back home." (Gah!!!) Anyway, they ended up having a lovely time playing tag, house and who knows what else.
Take care,
V